Countdown

I think one of the hardest days for me as a foster mom is the day that I find out the baby’s family will be coming to get them. All along I know that the baby will go to his or her forever family at some point but that day is unknown. It could be weeks or months away depending on the adoption process. But when I finally hear the words, “they are coming to Taiwan on…” my world always seems to shatter around me. The countdown has begun…my baby is leaving me.

Monday was that day for me. My little cookie girl will be with her forever family in just a month. 1 month. That’s all I have left with her. Of course I will still see her while the family is in Taiwan but she won’t be “my baby” anymore and I won’t be her mom anymore. My heart just hurts.

I went through the day feeling shocked, hurt, sad, happy (for the family who will be with their little girl), and just broken-hearted. It’s been almost a year since I’ve done this. I’m out of practice. Can I go through this again with the strength I’ve had for all the others? I made it through the day after many tears and snuggles with my baby. I’ve gotten through the first hurdle of saying goodbye to my baby.

Little Cookie Monster, I love you so so much and I have only a month left to show you just how much I love you. Let’s make it count!!

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